To say or not to say...

Source: http://www.diabolika.posterous.com/

Him: 'I'm still not over my ex. Don't think I am ready to see anyone at the moment'

You (Trying to be really cool and pretend not to care, because nobody likes a hysterical woman, right!?): 'No worries. I totally understand...'

What you really want to say: 'You inconsiderate prick! Winding me up with hundreds of explicit text messages that were supposed to lead somewhere, wasting my precious time only for you to realise you are so vulnerable and don't want to get hurt!! What about me, you moron? Did you think that maybe I have feelings too???!

Him: ......................... (Total silence after having chased you around to go on a date and you finally agreed)

You: ......................... (Total silence because you don't want to seem weak but it's eating you inside)

What you really want to say: 'WTF!!?'

Him: 'I just didn't feel there was a spark...Sorry.'

You: 'Fair enough. Nice to meet you anyway.'

What you really want to say: 'And when were you going to tell me that, you dick? Before or after you went missing? In fact, thanks a lot for not bothering to tell me. I sooooo love going on dates and not hearing back!'

Him: 'I am actually seeing someone at the moment and it wouldn't be fair on you.'

You: 'Thanks, I appreciate your honesty.'

What you really want to say: 'And you went out with me because...?'

You: 'Are you not having a good time?'

Him: 'No, no I do. Well, maybe not the best night i've ever had...'

You: 'Let's try to make the most of it then, shall we?'

What you really want to say: 'Prick!' and leave

To say or not to say... This is the question... When is it a good idea to say what you really think?

I mean, the result is just the same isn't it. Whether you say anything or not it doesn't change the fact that many of these people do not consider the fact that their actions have consequences and that yes, they may affect you. After all, you are a human being. You do have feelings. Feelings that need not be repressed...

Call me crazy but I've been saying what I think for a while now. It hasn't necessarily changed the situation to my advantage, nor did it suddenly made the other person realise how inconsiderate they were and apologise so I felt better. None of that crap. Some even became really defensive and had a go at me.

You'd think people should be capable of realising that any feed-back is valuable feed-back and that if sometimes you project a certain image, intentionally or not, and get comments about it, it means that perhaps you can adjust your attitude to improve that image. No need to take things personally. I like feed-back, I love becoming better, be a better me. I wouldn't know how to do that if I didn't listen to people telling me what they felt about me. I think it's only fair I should do the same. But I don't cease to be amazed by how many people out there are so full of themselves and take any criticism as a personal offense.

Not sure if it makes me feel better telling someone that their behaviour hurt me and that it really wasn't cool. I suppose it does, because it is the truth and it helps expressing feelings into words so you can then let go of them. The other person may even be evolved enough to take it as positive criticism. Yes, it may not be as dignifying as ignoring the situation and leaving the scene in solemn glory. But until I am capable emotionally to let go of a situation without feeling the need to express my anger or my frustration I will continue to do so. To say, I say!